Hunger

July 29, 2018

At seventeen, I started to starve myself
I thought that love was a kind of emptiness
And at least I understood then the hunger I felt
And I didn't have to call it loneliness

We all have a hunger
We all have a hunger
We all have a hunger
We all have a hunger

Tell me what you need, oh, you look so free
The way you use your body, baby, come on and work it for me
Don't let it get you down, you're the best thing I've seen
We never found the answer but we knew one thing

We all have a hunger

“Florence and the Machine – Hunger”

July 29, 2018

Today Florence and the Machine released their new album High as Hope, I love Florence, and as I sit at my desk today I am reflecting on not only her amazing songs but also on their connection to my experience last night. Her song “Hunger” has now been on repeat in my head, as I have navigated my new day ahead.

This song, has got me thinking about my own feelings of hunger, and where those feelings stem from; and when they the most dominant for me?

I have begun to notice that if I keep moving constantly forward through the world, if I get caught up in the “push” environment, with no conscious stopping, with no stepping out of the rush, then this hunger feeling that Florence sings about gets stronger and more powerful. And the gap between where I am, and where I think I should be, gets wider and wider; and all my orientation gets lost.

I have begun to recognise that this feeling is the symptom of the idea, that there is a gap between where I am, and what I feel right now; and my minds version of where I think I “should” be or what I “should” be feeling. This idea that I should be somewhere else, feeling something else. This is my hunger gap.

So last night, I was invited to stop, and I said “Yes”.

I attended a full moon kundalini yoga session. It was a beautiful setting, created in an enchanting room in which people trickled through the large wooden doors to escape after a long day of being in the “push” world.

It felt reassuring that there are people who make time for this type of self-connection and reflection at times when the world energy is strong, and we may tend to step away to avoid it as opposed to stepping in to meet it. We learnt about the current influences of the skies and heavenly bodies and the energy in the room, felt magical as the group toned in a sequence of AUM.

I simply sat on my yoga mat, breathing, listening, and moving with the single intention to align my mind, with my body, with my breath. This connection with this intention, body and breath was able to bring me back to a clear point of reflection and the truest quietest point of myself.

From the quiet, I felt that my eyes became bigger, my ears clearer and all my senses got sharper and I began to experience the true abundance that was in front of me; the glimmers of light, the diversity of sound, the taste, the depth of opportunity within the experience.

And slowly, through the broadening of my experience within the moment, my gratitude for every step that I took to get to the mat and to where I am right now began to grow within me, and as my gratitude expanded my internal hunger began to subsided.

My gratitude for this moment, for the invitation to be there, for saying Yes, for making the decision to turn up, to be on my mat, to fully experience the offering. The gratitude for all the steps that got me to that moment. To recognise, I was in that moment. To know that every step allowed the next one to unravel, and therefore each step had to be right. This was how the gap began to close and my hunger was feed.

By the time, the session was over and I walked out of the gorgeous room, through the wooden doors, I was full.

May you say YES to taking the tiny steps to stop pushing, to lay your mat down, to set the intention and to use the tools at your disposal, to bring you back to you, to a place of connection, to the place of gratitude for this moment; to know that where you are, is where you should be.

For this is the food that will truly satiate your hunger.

Is your hunger, the gap between what you have and what you desire?